Thursday, October 9, 2008

Brazil nuts of Bra-fill nuts?

To keep my brain functioning, I try to make sure I get enough fat.  Therefore, mixed nuts are an important source of my adipose tissue-building nutrition.  But there is  a complaint about these Walgreens brand deluxe lightly salted mixed nuts that I have been tolerantly harboring regarding the practice in which they fill the tin cans: Brazil Nuts.

No one likes brazil nuts.  You would never see a can of straight brazil nuts, because only a taste- budless fool with an affinity for small baby gerbils would buy them.  Cashews, on the other hand, are understandably loved by many, but in my quest for variety, I buy cashews with almonds, filberts and pecans before remembering in horror that about a fourth of the container holds the brazil nuts filler.

They are at least three times as big as their delicious counterparts, and once removed and discarded significantly deplete how much I previously believed I had purchased.  According to the reliable Wikipedia, these giant nuts have other purposes such using their oil to lubricate clocks or make artists' paint, so why then can't they stick to what they are good at and stop plaguing my snack time? 

Walgreens appears to have a 100% satisfaction guarantee, but I obviously am not.